This is my mate's latest Facebook entry, it creased me up....

His and hers diary:
Page one Sunday.
HERS: He was quite subdued, just not himself something was wrong, he hasn't kissed me all night, I think it's another woman. I went to bed and cried, he followed me up later. He lay still, eventually we made love and fell asleep in each other's arm's.
HIS: United lost at home again, fuckin' gutted but got a root though........